I understand that some level of grief will likely be a part of my life for – well, forever. So, I do what I can to find a way to move forward as best as I can.
I’ve joined a variety of grief support groups, which have been helpful. I’ve started this blog as an outlet for my thoughts and emotions. And, I’ve connected on a one-to-one basis with others who walk this same painful journey.
Recently, though, I received good counsel from a highly unlikely source: me. Rather, the other me … the Sherrie of years ago, the mom before she lost one of her sons to cancer at the age of just 23.
On May 18, 2011, I posted scripture from the Book of James. Facebook kindly sent me this memory 6 years later. I re-shared it last month:
Oh, how easily these words likely flowed from my heart onto my Facebook page … 6 years ago. A time when our family was whole and healthy.
I’m sure I was thinking about MY life being a vapor, and I was okay with that. But, Ian’s life — at the age of 23 — that doesn’t feel okay in any way, shape, or form.
Today, if I’m honest, these words can sting.
Today, this scripture is just painfully real.
And yet I can take a measure of comfort in it when I realize that this scripture is not designed to taunt me about the brevity of life here on earth. It is meant to motivate me to LIVE well today.
When I read this scripture, I am also reminded that while Ian’s earthly life was truly “but a vapor,” the Bible promises a blissful heaven for eternity where we will be reunited with him one day.
I can find comfort in these truths.
Ian lived like his life was a vapor and was more ALIVE than anyone I know.
If you know Ian or read about him here in this blog, you know he enjoyed the life that God gave him — every second of it. He was kind-hearted, effortlessly loved others, and always saw the glass as half-full.
While I’ve spoken often about what Ian liked to do in life, I don’t think I’ve shared much about his dislikes.
He hated gossip and wouldn’t put up with it.
He did not like to see people on the fringes of social circles. There was room for anyone in his life.
He did not tolerate harsh reactions and words, instead striving to be a peacemaker and nearly always exuding a positive vibe.
No, he wasn’t perfect. Sometimes he got himself into trouble. He didn’t travel the globe and never had the chance to leave his mark on the business world.
But Ian left a mark of pure love on many hearts. Since his passing many have told me so.
I can’t think of a better way to have spent his brief life, nor a better mark to have left on this troubled world.
We miss you everyday my love!
Yes! Great post!
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Thank you, findingjoyinhim41.
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Thank you for continuing to share your tender journey with us. As I read this post i was struck by your reflection that Ian did not have the chance to leave a mark in the business world but that he left a mark in many hearts. I’m sure I don’t have tell you, so I’ll join your own voice in saying that business achievements come and go. The marks we leave on others’ hearts stretch into eternity.
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Thank you so much for your comment. You’re right. Business world was on my mind because Ian had just graduated from business school…but I agree…it’s his love that lasts. God bless!
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